
"Don't try and compensate," she told me.
This Chapter was a complicated one, only because she got to experience both sides of me without actually preparing for it. At first, one could say that I can come on too strong, or angry. At other times, I can be calm and serene.
Every interaction I ever had with this Chapter allowed me to fully look into how she responded with me, and slowly I came to realize she was one not to be trifled with.
I was, at the time, struggling to make something of myself as I had recently been promoted. Wearing the vest was one thing, but having others respect it, well, that almost felt like an entirely separate task.
I always figured it was because I had climbed up the ranks, so to the new faces, they did not know how to act around me, whilst the older faces, they already knew me and how I reacted, so they were much cooler with me.
That's when it all began to be problematic; I can be too much of a nice guy at times, and I lose track of what I am supposed to be doing, and how it should be handle. I can't play favorites, and I have to learn to put my feet down when the situation calls for it. Sometimes that is incredibly hard to do with people you like and get along with swimmingly.
But for this Chapter, she could not read me at all.
It bothered her that I would switch so quickly; it bothered her that she couldn't understand why I did it, it bothered her and so she wanted no part of dealing with it.
She started avoiding me, she started distancing herself, all the while I was trying to do the opposite. Trying to "redeem" whatever quality of friendship I had already destroyed.
Unbeknownst to me, she had put up a wall and there was no way in hell I was gonna break it.
She was a free spirit and there was nothing I could do to tame her, for lack of a better word.
She, like many others, quit the job and disappeared into the fields of flowers, where she fit perfectly, hidden, and out of my sight, where she would no longer have to worry about me being rude, or extremely nice.