Chapter Ninety-Two: Moonchild

Where to begin,
or where to stop?
I hate my stubbornness,
from bottom to top.

Life throws you curveballs,
now I see,
how I often focused on my own stuff,
so I could not see--

Maybe it wasn't my business,
but you were my friend,
I should have been there more,
a shoulder to lend.

You just seemed so put together,
while I was a mess,
you kept telling me it would get better,
I should have cried less.

You showed me how pure your soul was despite all the pain,
if only I had someone else but myself to blame...
but no, it was me,
I ruined what friendship we had,
I can feel it cuz it's not the same,
that just makes me sad.

But I can't cry anymore,
no matter how much I try or want,
it just hurts me to write this,
just another dark haunt.

I could have been a better friend,
or less of a disaster,
but I fell in way too deep...
and you had enough to look after.

It did help, however,
the little times you gave me advice,
for that, you still hold dear,
that small room in my heart.

I see you happy now,
more than you've ever been,
and sometimes that is enough--
I don't need to be seen.

I just wanted to write down this informal goodbye,
I know, it's lame,
guess that's just how I've been,
​since the start.

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