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Chapter Sixteen: "Thin Ice"

6/11/2016

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Picture
Take a second and imagine guilt. How pure and raw it can taste, how precious it feels on the tip of your hands as you trace them down that person's face. That person you know you should probably stray away from, but want not to.

All you can imagine is the closeness, the sweet but sour taste of sin on your lips. The look she gives you when you hold her hair softly, then pull harder, making her lean closer to you.

For a guy that had everything under control, this one sure pushed him out of control rather easy.

Not to say I don't blame him; he was still in recovery, still broken--looking to hold onto the first thing that held an open hand.

Poor broken toy; but this one served as a means to an end. A satisfying taste, even for what little she stayed close to him.

There was a raw element to her; she was a fighter, never backing down from a fight, but always seemed to be picking one. Strong, but also shattered inside. Perhaps that it was because of how young she was compared to him. Young and raw; unsure of what she craved from life, but willing to try anything. And perhaps it was the fact that they had met at a hot spring that sparked that flame inside her. Or perhaps it was raw curiosity that pushed her to ask for his number.

One thing is for sure, he did not care if he felt wrong about it. Something inside him told him that he needed to save her.

He needed to help her; years later, he would come to find out the reason why she was broken. But you can not always fix everything that is broken, sometimes, that stays broken. Not because it can not be put together, but because it continuously keeps shattering.

But we all know how appetizing tragedy can be for a hero; the will to save is always buried beneath, and always pushes forward. Even when the person does not want to be saved.

So try as he may, he kept in touch with her, and as their friendship developed, he started to miss the point; she was playing him. She needed him at times, but at other times all she wanted to do was taste him, tease him, play him.

He was too stupid to see it, but she was not going to last in his life; but he was too focused on trying to save her. To teach her to stray away from wrong-doings. It was a pathetic attempt at a brother/sister relationship even though the fatal attraction was buried underneath both of them.

But sooner than later he would come to find, no matter how many secrets he told her, how much he tried to keep her from getting hurt, he needed to let her go.

However, this tragedy has a twist; he did not need to let her go. One day a switch had flipped inside her; one day, she chose to throw away whatever friendship was there, and simply insulted him, pushed him away, and erased him from her life.

All he could do was look and wonder... what did he do wrong?

But he would never get that question answered.


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    Tortured God

    I have come to realize that along the endearing journey most people call life, I’ve met (and still am currently meeting) countless numbers of women that have left a huge impact in my life.

    Whether it was pure randomness or coincidence, or perhaps fate, that is up for you to decide.


    Certain events have occurred and certain consequences had been brought. I am not pointing fingers nor throwing out blame, but most of these Chapters haven't ended well.

    Some remain, some have completely left my life. Some are still around and some have yet to resurface.

    For every action there is an equal reaction, and when it comes to the women in my life, this is often the case.

    I have always had my best intentions in mind, but something that is recurrent is that my emotions tend to cloud my judgement and tend to get in the way of things.

    So let me start at the beginning, recollecting memories, thoughts, and remembering dreams of what happened once, what happened next, and what will continue to happen after.

    This is the story of The Women in My Life. The Companion blog to this is The Men in My Life, right below this tab.


    ​Without further ado, let me welcome you to my recollection of true events, true people, but most of all, just the plain and simple God-honest, blunt and painful Truth about my Chapters and I.

    Do not expect a happy ending to some, however...
    ​
    This isn’t a fairy-tale.

    ​This...is Truth's Chapters.

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