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Book of Me

10/27/2025

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I self-published my first book.

only on Amazon.com!

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A Perfectly Messed Up Day

10/17/2025

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I don't do well when dealing with positivity,
and I,
don't exactly enjoy the attitude that life is rainbow and butterflies,
For me the world is full of misery, layers of hostility,
Most don't wake up to face the music,
they'll steal yours before you choose it.

To me it just ain't working fine,
can we find another way?
Another time?
We keep undermining a perfectly good day,
it just ain't paying off, so why, can't we let go, and leave it all behind?
I guess at least we tried, some things are good in the world anyway.

I always thought that I would be the one who chose positivity,
but now I just live negatively, knowing there's a lack of common sense,
then the voices keep guiding my hand, those thoughts still in my head,
those thoughts still in my head.

It's still not working fine,
can we find another way?
Another time?
We keep undermining a perfectly good day,
it just ain't paying off, so why, can't we let go, and leave it all behind?
I guess at least we tried, some things are good in the world anyway.

Living in a world where everybody thinks they know everything,
I confess they still know nothing,
I go by the touch and the feels of the songs they sing,
I go by feel about pretty much behind the scenes.
It ain't working fine for me,
I'm just saying, that's how it is,
it ain't working fine for me,
just another perfectly messed up day.
A perfectly messed up day.

It's still not working fine,
can we find another way?
Another time?
We keep undermining a perfectly good day,
it just ain't paying off, so why, can't we let go, and leave it all behind?
I guess at least we tried, some things are good in the world anyway.

It just ain't paying off, so why, can't we let go, and leave it all behind?


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I Quit Running

10/16/2025

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He spent years in the shadow of his own undoing,
Feet always ready, heart never pursuing.
Trouble sang softly at the edge of each day,
But he’d lace up his shoes and just run away.
The echoes of questions, the weight of regret,
Like songs half-remembered he tried to forget.
His life was a rhythm of dodging the tune,
Afraid that the music would play out too soon.
But sunrise grows bolder as night starts to fade,
And silence, he found, is where courage is made.
One morning he stopped, with the world standing still,
And heard in his heart a new kind of thrill.
“Face the music,” they said, and he finally heard
The wisdom that trembled behind every word.
No longer a fugitive, no longer alone,
He danced with his problems, a life overgrown.
There, in the spotlight, he found he could bear
The notes that once haunted, now lighter than air.
For running brought distance but never relief,
While facing the music uncovered belief.


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X Marks The Spot

10/9/2025

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Come On,
Come All,
Shoot To Thrill,
Many Secrets To Spill.

Who Dare Ask The Right Questions?
I Am Open To Suggestions.

Do Not Be Scared, We Do Not Bite.
Care To Find Out More?
Ask Away And You Just Might.

X Marks The Spot,
El Lo Sabe,
Xavier's His Name,
El Tiene La Clave,
Like Moth To Flame,
Nada Grave,
No Te Preocupes,
Solo Hay Momentos Agradables.


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Arte de:
Marvel Knights: Ghost Rider #2 of #6 - Clayton Crain
Fallen Angel Wings - SwarzezTier on deviantart

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New Writing: Sneak Peek

10/7/2025

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Life Update:

​been working on a few short stories and a couple books. Follow the tab "Fiction" below the "Thoughts" Main Menu tab for some sneak peeks!

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Sober

10/4/2025

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"I am blooming from the wound I once bled." - Rune Lazuli.

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C is for Contaminated

You wanted to get to know me,
that's why you memorized the hallway in my brain,
I knew before you told me to get right,
and you took my existence for granted,
and you threw me out like I threw out your family.
Almost like you planned it in one day.

I hated the way you said it,
told me those mean words that day,

Maybe I'd believe you if you'd let me stay,
But I didn't like the way you did it,
Nah, didn't like the way you shoved me,
led me astray.
So I left for years, went my own way,

​And I wish I could've changed it,
so We wouldn't remain contaminated,
and oh, I know what you need,
starting to let me go,
being together We're stained.

You said the world was against Us,
I told you, "you care too much what they say, Z"
You said, "do me a favor and trust my word"
Cuz you promised then and now again,
You said, "Cass let me prove it, look at the world instead,
my word is bond, just trust me, Sis"


And I wish I could've changed it,
so We wouldn't remain contaminated,
and oh, you know what I need,
starting to let you go,
being together We're stained.

And I wish I could've changed it,
so We wouldn't remain contaminated,
and oh, I know what you need,
starting to let me go,
being together We're stained.

And I wish I could change it
And We're always gonna be contaminated
And oh, I know what We need
You start letting me go
Cuz being together We're contaminated.
art by Nanda Corrêa
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Guillotine

9/30/2025

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Start Over,
But Stay Closer,
You're Now Sober,
Welcome Cassandra, It's October.

Come Lay,
Stay,
No Longer Prey,
No One Will Betray--

You Are Home;
Write Alongside Me
This Poem.

Will I be okay, T, is that true?


What Are You Afraid Of? Blue?

I've been here before, and you know what happened.

And Then Blue Saddened.

Because I break everything I touch.

You Feel You Are--

Too fucking much.

All You Have To Do... Is Stay.

Hearsay!

This Is Your Pathway,
Do Not Run Away.


Stay?

And Soon It Will Come,
Our Day.



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Art by:
​"Lady Justice" - Hamka Risha
"guillotine" - Taras

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God's Weapon

8/30/2025

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Ce monstre sera avec toi jusqu'à ta mort. N'aie pas peur de lui, avec le temps tu comprendras comment l'utiliser, le contrôler, le dompter… Libère-le.


What you got ain't nothing new, this life is hard on people. To live is to suffer, to survive is to find meaning in the suffering. Even when you can't stop what's coming. 

We cling to pain because we want to understand it. We don't need to understand it. We just need to let it go.


“We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... and also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls.
Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.” 
― Hunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream
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The Bad Spot

6/30/2025

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It's Coming, Z.
Nor You Or I Can Stop It.

What's that, T?

The Bad Spot.

Does "it" have a name?

Let Me Out Of This Prison, 
And I May...Just May...

Tell.

You're never getting out of here, T.

The Bad Spot Will Take Over, Like Black Mold--
--It Will Cover It All.

Until There Is Nothing Left...

But Her.


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Dealer's Choice

6/24/2025

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Rent was due,
I could not afford it,
maybe it was my luck,
but then they chose to sue,
I had to evacuate,
but had no other place,
those four walls are no longer,
there is no such thing as home,
so once again I'm stuck,
I'm supposed to stay strong,
but every day is difficult,
like this is my last song.

Time keeps running,
and my pocket is getting empty,
I want to find a place,
but it is not safe.

I'm hiding in those shadows,
the shadows of my mistakes,
I wish I could erase them,
but I cannot fake--

--but the hope never dies,
and neither do I.
Home is not a place,
home is the people that make it.

I find this beacon of hope,
a small yet bright light,
the safe place I was seeking,
home is awaiting,
​to make me alive.


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    "The Collective©" -
    A Vessel of Opportunity, circa 2011-Present and ongoing.

    Welcome dear reader to my own Pandora's Box-- inside and outside The Aether. This is where fiction and reality clash as gods and monsters dance engulfed in long standing battles for power, control, and ultimately, peace amongst one another.

    "Endings are hard, but in reality, nothing ever ends, does it?"


    Check out my Deviantart website for my art at: http://p1ls3n3r.deviantart.com/

    Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents on this site are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

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